Appreciation Issue

Sometime i don't know it is me that is having problem. I always caught when trying to do something good but ended in a reverse result. 

Firstly let's talk about $, i get very perturbed when people mentioned about year end bonus. Every house got their own sad story and i won't dig into and as i respect each other privacy and "sorrow". Mine? very simple, i wanted a family and to sustain a family and getting into it needs= $$, so as much as i can i try to save for the days ahead. I am not a nature stingy person, but for future i need to? So as things turn out to be, in Apr need about 4K for the wedding packages, 1K in May for the Taiwan trip and subsequently, and also need a 4k proposal ring. Total 9k, and i think prior to the wedding dinner i need to set aside 4k plus for all the miscellaneous expense. On top of that, i need to prepare 10k for the wedding dinner, in the event that losses occur at least i have 10k to top up. After writing this i am really worried... not forgetting my daily expense.

After all these, time will be better i guess, i think maybe i got no choice but to take up renovation loan when my new house comes. Looking at things that are going.. I am happy yet very skeptical, i wanted this to happen but i guess i will pull through with faith and determination. I know Yeo Yeo will eventually read this, but point to her is that i am not complaining, i just want you to know. I will do my best, i will have my Apr, Jul and Oct bonus to tide me through and i will make a point that we will go JAPAN. I just want you to lower yr anger when things don't go smooth at certain points. If you ask me i really hope  we will be together as long as we can. 

Sometime i also got this feeling that, when i wanted to do something to make my Yeo Yeo happy it became the bad. First instance was, on 17th Dec, knowing that she go shopping with Cas, i volunteer to fetch and have dinner, cos i reject my happy hour at boat quay, cos i somewhat miss her, but then again, i am not sure why i am also very tired.( Think i need to go check up)  i decided to walk alone and let her and Cassandra talk.  Ultimately, i did not talk much as i am really shack... 

But then Yeo Yeo pissed and vent her anger on her I phone which i got her, she throw her phone which i was a bit stunned. Then she said to me that i affected her mood and i always black face, i wanted to be jolly and happy too, but was too tired. When i am back home i slept quite quickly. 

Then the next day, as our mood gets better, we went out again. We went several places, 3 malls in fact. First we went to Anchor point and Queensway, then in Queensway, i decided to get her a LIVERPOOL Polo and me got 1 too. I was happy cos finally she decided to wear some with regards to LIVERPOOL. But the real reason is for our wedding shoot,  butt he photo is not the one we got. 

Next we move to VIVO city. Am supposed to get my Yeo Yeo some LA SENZA panties. So we went and choose 5 gorgeous panties for 40 bucks, they were priced at 18 dollar each.  

After that , Yeo Yeo wanted a dress, red one in Pull and Bear, it was quite nice but unfortunately there is no size, cos the ones she tried , a bit faulty. So i suggest the leopard skin dress, but it was too expensive. 70 buck. So she did not get it, then as we decide where to eat, we headed to NEX, where we will eat Tepayaki. Yeo Yeo say she treat, then as she wanted to buy something in CITIGEM and i wanted to get sushi for mom, we split. 

Oh then as we decided to head for our dinner, she was talking on the phone and too engross on her conversation. Thinking to save money, i decided to suggest EAT, YEO YEO also like to eat so i thought it is ok, beside my hands are relly full of stuff from cold storage. Thinking it is a small issue, after her conversation i told her about eating in EAT, she blasted at me, saying that i am very fickle minded and that she is set to eat that, why i change her mind. Reluctantly, she agreed, then at that moments, i don't know why when i am ordering, i began to shed a bit of tear as i am very angry at what i have done wrong. Anyway it last a while only, naturally i am very forgiving. 

Then when i got home , with all the things that i got from the day's shopping, i wanted to arrange dearie stuff neat and tidy, so i clear the drawer to allow her to have space for clothes and also her cosmetics, arrange it nicely so that when she comes, everything is set aside for her also intend to wash her panties so that she can wear the next day. 

But then she called, the moment we spoke,she asked, WHY DID YOU ONLY TT 1040 to me? Was it suppose to be 1229?.. For that moment i was disappointed abit, guess anyone would? So i dropped everything and started to check why i short change her? usually knowing her, i tried not to make misatke with money, cannot be why i only tt 1040 only.. at that moment i can't think of anything, maybe it me, so i tt to her. After hanging up, as i gather my thoughts, i remembered why... 

So i guess, after her incident she is cautious about $$ but i just wanted to her to know not to live in the past and should move forward, personally i would respect her and would take advantage of her in term of $$ so i hope she could trust me. 

Overall I am not angry, am sometime disappointed. maybe sometime i tried in a wrong way i guess. 

Good Week ahead , as it is Xmas!!